I had to have all my hair chopped off so I could kill Flower entirely. So Flower was murdered that night!LEAP Then I decided I'm leaving. I'm going to San Francisco. So I took my two suit cases and moved to the Cable Car Hotel. And then I went cruising. I went cruising for everything.
When I first came here I was really fucked up. I had a bunch of LSD thrown on my skin. I met this woman, she had really dark skin, sort of wavy hair. I couldn't really say what her ethnic background was. She was very exotic. She was really beautiful, she looked like a lion. I just kept staring at her at this restaurant and then Steve, the Mafia man from Greece, decided to introduce us. She was his trick, he was paying her way. She looked really rich and stuff because he was supporting her. She was really young, probably 17, 18. I didn't know that until later. She looked a lot older, mature looking. She sat down with me and asked me if I wanted to go out with her. I said "Sure." She wanted to go to the Stud. She said to him, "I want to take her out, I want a hundred dollars." He goes, "Okay," and gives her a hundred dollars.
We go to the Stud on her money in a cab. She goes, "Can you watch this for a second?" She's walking around and she's got a purse filled up, tons of powdered coke. She was dealing large quantities of coke at the Stud. Bags and bags of cocaine! I was like, "Oh, my fuck" You know, she's got so MUCH fucking coke. It was very Mafioso. Then she wanted to leave after she sold a bunch of bags. She went to the Stud, I guess she was paged, she already had deals set up there. I thought, this is fucking weird, this is like LA, it's all the same. She said, "I need you. I need protection." And I'm like, "I'm from LA. Whatever." So I just went with her. She needed protection. We went up to these black guys' condominium. I don't know why. I was out of my head from all the LSD that was put in my body. I actually went along with this. Normally I probably wouldn't have taken this risk.
I went up to this condo with her and there were these four guys who were really rich and they were living in a penthouse. It was not really the Tenderloin, it was more the Nob Hill area. One of them started slapping her around, and said, "What did you do? You took some of the bags!" I told the other one, "What are they doing to her? Tell him to leave her alone!" And I scared the other guy and he went in the room and said, "Okay, let her go." I guess I was a witness. They were so Mafia that since they didn't know me they didn't really fuck with me. They were organized crime, too organized to be really street. They were different, their way of dealing with things. One of them said "I'll give you a ride and I didn't want to get in the car. She said, "Let's just go," and I didn't know what was going on and I felt like the girl was going to get killed so I just went with her. I got out of the car and this guy threw her out the door.
I decided I didn't want anything to do with her after that. I kind of dodged the restaurant for a while. When I did bump into that guy again he said, "You want to borrow a thousand bucks? I'll give you a thousand bucks." I was really broke and living in the Haight. I decided I know where to get money. He said, "Yeah, yeah, you can get a job, come up here and get some applications." He brings me upstairs and I go "Wait, wait, I don't need to be up here." He goes, "Well, if you need some money now I'll give you a thousand dollars." He wanted me to see his bullet holes in his chest. Something creepy about this guy.
Sometimes I take people down to that restaurant. Steve the Greek's on Polk Street. I take everybody there because it's nostalgic skeeze. Andrew, a creative, well-read person, said, "Yeah, I like this place, it reminds me of a place where you would do business, tell people you either do this or blam. The last of these scuzz-holes except the Hungry Eye. Hidden hole-in-the-walls in this city.
After I moved here I did a film. I was broke and I wanted to make money. There was a lot of jobs on the coffee shop walls. I saw modeling jobs. I called a modeling ad and a guy chained me up to a ceiling and took some pictures. I took my friend Chester with me for protection. Chester is about five-foot-four and weighs about a hundred and eight pounds and he's a wimpy little nerd and everybody thinks he's a swishy queeny fag boy but he's really straight and he can never get a date with a woman because they don't believe that he's straight. He can't even convince anyone. [laughs] Isn't that great? And he looks great, when I first met him I put lipstick on him and I feminized him and he made a great woman, actually. He looks better as a girl. So I brought Chester with me, then they chained me up to the ceiling. I made 75 bucks.
Then I did a David Lynch style movie for some city college freak guy and I had the role of a hooker and I had to simulate fucking but the cigarette was real. I put a cigarette out on this guy's chest. And then I didn't want to go back. I told them they should give me 200 more dollars.
Then I got paid to get branded. I met a woman at a blues festival who said do you know anybody who would want to get branded for a Japanese magazine. I told her I would. So she took me to Body Manipulations and paid me a hundred dollars for a branding on my belly. I did discover a lot of jobs in my twenties. I milked my twenties. I milked my rough-trade, scarred up look. I got all kinds of different S/M type jobs. I had the right look. I'm looking for a new job. I'm looking for an ejaculation film to star in. Should I put it in the paper?
I'm looking to do porno films. I ejaculate. I look like a boyish type girl. I shave every day. Twice a day sometimes. I'm not on testosterone.Do I look Tranny? I'm not butch or femme, you know what I mean? I'm just kind of me?
When Sonia did this one S/M scene with me I was Flower, she was Stu. Stu was this misogynist pig who was a plumber. And he was an asshole and I was Flower. Flower was repressed, Flower couldn't fend for herself, and was useless and worthless and pathetic. She couldn't speak unless she was told to speak. It was such a tragedy that I cut all my hair off that night. I went down to Garlic's house and I said, "Garlic, I need you to cut my hair. I don't want your roommate to do it, I have to have you do it," Because Garlic was more boy-like. I had to have all my hair chopped off so I could kill Flower entirely. So Flower was murdered that night! I like that short hair look. It's kind of like James Dean, cigarette in his mouth, walking down. Any way, Flower was a tragedy. I basically, from that experience, I see that WHO WANTS TO BE FLOWER? NOBODY. Everybody would murder the Flower from within. Don't you think?
ZANNE No, I think some people desperately WANT to be Flower.
LEAP Sonia said I always wanted to be like that. Have that little thing in me. And I go, "Well, that's something I don't want." Some femme girls definitely want to be Flower, right?
ZANNE And some boys, too.
LEAP See, Flower was wearing a flapper dress. I have like a 1920's body, from what Cricket told me, a 1916 to 1920 body, so a flapper dress fits me well beacuase it's built for my style of frame, you know, up and down surf-board look. But I just couldn't handle it. The only dress I'll wear is my Naval Academy dress, these days that's the only one that I'm putting on. I love my Naval Academy dress, and I also like that Cranky Dress that Hazel stole. Remember my Ross dress, it's a Pinochio dress. A rust and green plaid, I wore it to Muffdive. I gotta find Hazel. That dress is so cool. It looked like it was made out of paper. It was great.
That plant hoder looks a little bit like Sonia. Once Sonia gets older and she's more in to her role as a sadist, if she ever gets there, she might get there but she'll be about forty.
ZANNE Some people don't get their high moments til then.
LEAP Yeah. I think I might be on a plateau, though. I don't have those youth insecurities. You know, when you're really sturdy in your person, that's your plateau. Your peak is usually when you are free from yourself, you know, and you don't care what's around you.
ZANNE Well, you never stay the same from day to day, but you're more sturdy, now.
LEAP [laughing] Sturdy! Watch out, I'm STURDY.
ZANNE STURDY THIRTIES.
LEAP Should I change my name to Sturdy? Leap Sturdy. I can change it at City Hall. No, I like Frogg. Did you know that Kim changed her last name to Sinclair? She saw a sign when she was driving in her car, she saw Sinclair Paints, and she just went and changed it that day. She's wacky, don't you think?
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